“Fear is a habit; so is self-pity, defeat, anxiety, despair, hopelessness and resignation. You can eliminate all of these negative habits with two simple resolves: I can!! …And I will!!”
There is positive in everything; even the darkness of night has a light that shines through. Photo taken by Dianne Furphy on 4/17/2011.
From what I remember, I was a negative person
ever since my teenage years; right after my mother died at the age of 15. Not until my early twenties I started making a gradual turn towards the positive side of life. Like I mentioned in my previous personal experiences posts, my hubby [and my dear cousin, along with other very few friends] are the ones to thank for making me realize how good life can be in every situation that comes at me. I would have to say that I am still in the process of changing; especially working on a better me, a more positive me. But who isn’t still in the process of changing? Aren’t we all forever changing in such ways—either negative or positive? …I like to think so. Some people who once knew the negative side of me—who basically grew up with me—seem not to understand where I am coming from today. If anything, they think I am crazy and think I preach too much positive talk. My opinion: there is never too much positivity in one’s life. I try to be a positive influence in the people’s lives that I love and care about but sometimes it’s a battle when they just don’t get it. So where does that leave us? …On opposites ends of the spectrum. Being that I was a negative person many years back and changing my whole entire perspective, attitude and thoughts and focusing only on the better side of life, it is extremely difficult to even put myself back how I used to think with the whole negative outlook. I just don’t comprehend it anymore. It is odd to me that I was once told from a person who is not on the same page as me with the whole positive perspective that they missed the old me. The old me, the one that did not have a care in the world, who did drugs, drank way too much alcohol for my own good, selfish, suicidal and all the negative that goes along with it. Over a period of years, I had to train my mind to refocus all of my thoughts on the good in life. Once I started believing I could do this, I started setting goals for myself and once I started completed them goals, I started to realize how much of a better person I was becoming. I believe the first goal of mine was to quit doing drugs
and drinking alcohol, then it was quitting smoking
cigarettes and even overcame an eating disorder
I was struggling with for so many years. From then on out, my life just kept getting better. The first real big thing I ever did for myself was enroll myself into school and four years later, I graduated with honors, holding a cumulative G.P.A. of a 3.97 which is something I am most proud of and on top of that having a son and being the best mother that I can be. I am still setting high goals for myself because it is a challenge in my life; it is what keeps me motivated and keeps me living my life to the fullest. It seems life only keeps getting better
by wanting to do better for myself. I changed what I had to so I could escape that negative, unhappy life I was living. Now all I can do is hope for the people I love and care about to overcome their sense of fear of changing their life for the better. I know they have what it takes as long as they put their mind to it and use their full potential to do so. For I am always here for my loved ones and even strangers; if everyone could see I want to be that positive influence for them since not many of us have that supportive guidance.
“We cannot change our past. We can not change the fact that people act in a certain way. We can not change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude.”~ Charles R. Swindoll
Whatever attitude you have towards life—positive or negative—it reflects who you are. Photo taken by Dianne Furphy on 3/20/2011 at Penny Pack Park in Philadelphia.
Here are some Guided Tips on how to Cope Effectively With Negative People that I have personally experienced and recommend:
“There is little difference in people, but that little difference makes a big difference. The little difference is attitude. The big difference is whether it is positive or negative.” ~W. Clement Stone
- Approach the situation in a calm manner. Calm yourself by doing breathing exercises or whatever technique that may work for you.
- Sometimes remaining silent is the best way to deal with a negative person. Saying something back only stirs up more negative and has you fall into their trap.
- Sometimes the best thing to do is avoid the negative person, if it comes down to it, exit the negative person out of your life. For all they are is poison and toxins; they will only bring you down with them.
- Laugh. Find something you find funny and keep laughing and remain your positive self. Laughing is the cure for many negative situation’s in life.
- Keep reassuring yourself you are a positive person and remain in a positive state-of-mind.
- If in an argument don’t explain how you feel, for they might use that against you to fall into their negative black hole that will just suck you right in and you may be left feeling down and all worked up.
- Never try and debate with a negative person. They just won’t understand.
- If you have no other choice but to be surrounded by negative people, try to keep it short and simple. Ignore any negative comments and reverse the conversation with a positive statement.
- Always remain with a positive attitude when dealing with any type of negative situations. It will most likely work out to your advantage.
Everyone has a choice in their life; it is called free will. Your outlook and your perspective determines where your path in life will lead you—Positive or Negative… You decide! Photo taken by Dianne Furphy on 3/20/2011 at Penny Pack Park in Philadelphia.
Do you deal with a lot of negative in your life? If so, what do you think causes it? How did you overcome the negative? What do you do to keep yourself motivated and remaining in a positive mind-set? I would love to hear your feedback on this topic… please leave your comments, opinions or whatever you like to share in the comment box below. Thank You!
“Believe in yourself and you can create what you want.” -Dianne Furphy
This link is correlated to this post: http://createwhatyouwant.wordpress.com/2011/04/18/negative-people-guided-tips-on-how-to-cope-effectively/